Shocking treatment

A 72-year-old farmer recently saw me for his diabetic check. He had new-onset AF, confirmed by an ECG, so we chatted about his options.

We talked about warfarin and agreed I would refer him for cardioversion, because from his symptoms it sounded as if he had been in AF for some time.

‘Well doctor, a bit of electricity is all right. I’ve had many a shock from an electric fence, and look at me, I’m fine,’ he remarked.

When we next met, he said he felt well, and had had all his blood tests and an INR booking. I took his pulse which was regular.

Another chat ensued, and I explained to him that sometimes AF can resolve spontaneously. Just before he left I joked: ‘You’ve not been playing around with any fences have you?’

He went quiet for a few seconds, then said: ‘Well doc, we were setting up a sheep fence yesterday. I didn’t realise it was on; it gave me a nip, and threw me backwards.’

Dr Rob Mitchell
Tutbury, Staffordshire 

Organic mower

While visiting an old man who lived in a country cottage, I strolled through his garden and

was met by a horned, vicious animal. It looked up from munching grass and stared at me with evil intent. Terrified, I raced across the grass.

‘Hey, Tom,’ I panted, ‘you’ve got an animal in your garden.’

‘I know,’ he replied, ‘me lawn mower has broken down.’

Dr Sheila Edwards
High Peak, Greater Manchester  

GUM trouble

A young man rang to make an appointment last week and explained that ‘usually I’d go to the GUM clinic for this’ but asked to see the GP on this occasion.

Our receptionist replied: ‘We don’t normally deal with dental problems here.’

He managed to explain and got in to see me the next day when he told me about his conversation. I had to laugh too.

Dr Ed Morris
Witney, Oxfordshire 

Never a truer word

A patient with long-standing bowel problems attended recently with a recurrence of his   diarrhoea. ‘I suppose it’s the old problem with my anal sprinkler,’ he said.

Dr Michael Thompson
Dungannon, County Tyrone